The Inevitable Cycle of Change

Each season brings about an inevitable cycle of change and transformation of the land, the climate, and even social and cultural tradition. Change involves making a shift from one state to another. It is the natural and continual cycle of the universe and earth, and ironically, is something we can rely on as a constant in life. Why, then, are we such creatures of habit with a natural instinct to resist change?

Change can be either self-imposed or imposed by others. The changes we choose for ourselves we respond favorably towards because we know it will most likely bring about a better circumstance. However, when change is forced on us, we oftentimes resist because we are uncertain and/or fearful of the results. Recent advances in brain analysis technology have allowed researchers to track brain reactions to thoughts about change, and the results are clear. We all pretty much react the same way to change—we resist it!

Most of our daily tasks are repetitive and habitual requiring little mental energy. When we have to learn a new task or make a change to our routine or habits though, it requires a great deal more energy thereby yanking us out of our comfort zone and into unfamiliar territory. This, in turn, can engage the “fight or flight” response causing us to become overwhelmed with the complex and unfamiliar concepts. Once in this state, we are then subject to the physiological and psychological disorientation and pain that can manifest as anxiety, depression, fear, sadness, fatigue or anger.

The quantum model of reality tells us that in order to change our lives we must change the way we think, act and feel. How many of us wouldn’t love to improve our life or business in one way or another? Here’s the catch—to do so requires change. The good news is that recent brain studies are showing us that we can overcome our habits and change our lives by using a variety of techniques, some of which include meditation, guided imagery, and repeated affirmations and demonstrations of change.

“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.” –Jim Rohn

Deborah Perkins

Luminous Transformations

480-788-7140

What is Coaching?

Luminous Transformations Coaching Method

Coaching is not therapy, counseling, mentoring, consulting or advising but is about communication, action and achievement.  Coaching is about posing powerful questions for you to consider with the hope that you will see new possibilities that can shift your perspectives and ultimately cause a shift is your personal reality. A coach will not tell you what to do but will enable you to find the answers that lie within.

An effective coach will use coaching tools and techniques that enable you to get in touch with what you really want, help you create measurable goals along with an achievable action plan, and then hold you accountable throughout the process to agreed-upon actions and timelines.

A coach is different from a therapist. Here are a few important differences between coaching and therapy:

• Coaching is about achievement whereas therapy is about healing.
• Coaching is about action whereas therapy is about understanding.
• Coaching is about transformation whereas therapy is about change.
• Coaching is about intuition whereas therapy is about feelings.
• Coaching is about performance whereas therapy is about progress.
• Coaching is about creating whereas therapy is about resolving.

A coach is different from a consultant. A consultant’s role is to provide their clients with answers based on their experience and knowledge in a given area whereas a coach will guide their clients to find the answers for themselves.

Similarly, a mentor’s role is to provide the mentee with knowledge and guidance to achieve a goal based on the mentor’s knowledge and experience with that particular goal. A coach will guide a coachee through the process of self-discovery to gain clarity on what they want, identify their challenges, and develop a plan to achieve their goals.

If you would like to make an important life change but aren’t clear on exactly what to change or how to go about making the change, a coach will empower you to overcome your obstacles so that you can take the steps needed that are for your greatest good within an achievable timeline. Call Deborah at Luminous Transformations to learn more and schedule your first session.

Deborah Perkins
Luminous Transformations
480-788-7140

Regression Therapy

Regression therapy originated in hypnotherapy. It is a technique used to help someone access a past memory in order to heal a present issue and can work wonders with inexplicable fears, guilt or shame, anxiety, depression, relationship issues, or with a number of psychosomatic problems. It is a safe, low-cost, and drug-free way to overcome psychological issues and its effects can be immediate.

For example, a client came to me for help with a fear of closed-in spaces, especially airplanes. She had to travel the next day by airplane and wanted to reduce her anxiety before and during the flight. When I regressed her to the point of the first occurrence of her fear of closed-in spaces, she was able to remember a time when she was very young and would hide in a closet whenever her parents argued. This memory was the trigger point to her current fear of closed-in spaces.

Oftentimes, just the remembrance of a past memory can greatly reduce or alleviate the present effect. In this case, my client reported that although her claustrophobia symptoms were not entirely alleviated, her symptoms were reduced to the point where she was able to relax enough to enjoy the flight.

Another client of mine who was accosted by a burglar while in her home, requested regression hypnotherapy to remember more details about the experience in order to help the police solve the crime. A detective joined us during the session and recorded it in case additional details were uncovered. We agreed that the primary goal of the session would be to reduce her fear so that she could once again sleep and feel safety in her own home. Although a few more details about the attack were revealed during the session, the most important result was that her fear was greatly reduced to the point that she was able to sleep for the first time since the incident. Over the following weeks, she reported to me that the hypnosis session reduced her fear and allowed her to once again feel peace and safety in her own home.

Past-life regression therapy is a form of hypnotherapy used to help a person access a previous lifetime memory to understand and resolve a current unexplained issue. Whether the story brought to mind while under hypnosis is true or a fabrication of the mind is not the focus of the session. The focus is on using the healing power of our subconscious mind and imagination to learn about and resolve the present issue at hand.

If you have questions about regression or past-life regression hypnotherapy and how it may be able to help you, please contact me. I would be happy to answer your questions.

Deborah Perkins

Luminous Transformations

480-788-7140

Deborah@LuminousTransformations.com

EFT - Tapping Your Way to Health and Wellbeing

The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is a method of energetic healing that utilizes a number of theories from alternative medicine such as acupuncture, neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), energy medicine, and Thought Field Therapy (TFT).  While related to acupuncture, EFT does not use needles. Instead, it is a simple process wherein a person mentally tunes into a specific issue while stimulating certain meridian points on the body by tapping on them with their fingertips. When properly done, EFT balances disturbances in the meridian system thereby reducing the duration of conventional therapy procedures. Anyone can learn the techniques and experience positive results.

EFT is used for physical, emotional, and performance issues and operates on the premise that there are unresolved emotional issues causing a disruption in the body’s energy system. Even physical issues such as chronic pain and diagnosed illnesses can be caused by emotional stress that impedes the body’s natural ability to heal itself. Some of the emotional impediments to health that EFT is used to alleviate are stress, anger, fear, grief and low self-esteem.

Losing weight is a cultural obsession backed by a billion-dollar industry. While healthy eating habits and exercise are important ingredients for achieving and maintaining optimal weight, most often there are emotional issues driving poor or obsessive eating habits. EFT works on the energy body to release blockages that build up in the body’s energy pathways (meridians) from traumatic life experiences and negative emotions. Once the energy pathways are cleared and energy is able to flow freely once again, the body can do the work it is designed and heal emotional and physical issues.

One of the best things about EFT is that it is safe, free to practice, and can be done almost anywhere with only 5 brief steps to complete. Once the technique is memorized, each round can be performed in about 30 seconds. Click here for a brief intro (6:58 minutes) on EFT from founder Gary Craig. It is important to note that although you can learn and practice the techniques yourself, in order to receive the most benefit, work with a skilled practitioner. Email Deborah@LuminousTransformations.com or call to schedule an appointment and begin your journey to health and wellbeing. For special savings on your first appointment, click on the Join & Save button on the Luminous Transformations.

Deborah Perkins
Luminous Transformations

480-788-7140

Dream Weavers

Paramhansa Yogananda's poem "God! God! God!" referenced the idea of the mind weaving dreams. The original reference to the term "dream weaver" may have been spiritual, but many current teachings talk of using our mind's power to manifest our dreams. However, to be a powerful dream weaver requires that we know the threads needed to weave a dream into reality.

First, we begin with the threads of an idea or fantasy. Oftentimes these threads will appear as lucid dreams when our bodies and minds are relaxed and our imaginations engaged. Lucid dreams are dreams in which we are aware that we are dreaming, and usually occur spontaneously. With practice, anyone can cultivate this skill.

Some of the world’s greatest scientists and artists actively engaged in lucid dreaming. Albert Einstein regularly utilized the power of his lucid dreams and said, “Your imagination is your preview of life’s coming attractions.” Director, James Cameron, cited lucid dreams as being the inspiration for the movie Avatar. He said “…I’ve kind of realized that what I was trying to do was create dream imagery, create a lucid dream state while you’re watching the film.”

Successful dream weaving may start with a dream but it certainly doesn’t end there. The threads of passion and purpose must be woven into the fabric. Purpose weaves reason and meaning into the fabric, and passion weaves in the fire necessary to make the dream vibrant and compelling.

The next vital threads of our tapestry include our values and goals for these constitute our compass pointing us in the right direction. Furthermore, when we align our values and goals, we remain focused on the priorities of our work ensuring the most direct and luminous path to fulfillment.

Finally, we must weave in the threads of reality for powerful and successful dream weaving requires planning, hard work, dedication and persistence. Imagination and reality go hand-in-hand and are both necessary components for bringing your dreams to life.

When my mind weaves dreams
With threads of memories,
On that magic cloth will I emboss:
God! God! God!
- Paramhansa Yogananda

Control Dramas

Control dramas are behaviors exhibited to secure power or control over a person or group of people. They are conscious or unconscious struggles for power—competitions for human energy. Whether or not you are aware, you have exercised control dramas and have been the victim of other people’s control dramas throughout your life. However, you may find that there are 1 or 2 specific control dramas you demonstrate based on your personality type and learned behaviors.

In the book The Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield, he outlines 4 major control dramas:

• The Intimidator: This highly aggressive control drama is demonstrated through threats, either verbal or physical, to force you to bend to this person’s will for fear that something bad might happen to you, or sometimes just to get you to pay attention to this person and give him or her your energy.
• The Poor Me or Victim: Contrary to the Intimidator drama, this control drama is very passive. A person demonstrating this drama will tell you all the horrible things that are happening to him or her, implying that you are responsible, and that if you refuse to help, these horrible things will continue. They position everything they say and do to put you in a place where you have to defend against the idea that you are not doing enough for this person. They make you feel guilty just being around them.
•  The Interrogator: The person demonstrating this control drama is subtle in their aggression, finding fault and slowly undermining your world in order to get your energy. They set up a drama of asking questions and probing into your world with the specific purpose of finding something wrong with your answers. Once they do, then they criticize this aspect of your life. If this strategy succeeds, you will suddenly find yourself becoming self-conscious about your words and actions. You will pay attention to what the interrogator is doing and thinking about because you don’t want to do something wrong that the Interrogator will notice. This psychic deference gives the Interrogator the energy he or she desires.
• The Aloof: A person demonstrating the Aloof control drama will withdraw from conversations. They will look and act mysterious and secretive and may tell you, or give you the impression, that they are being cautious when in fact they are trying to pull you into their drama. You will find yourself trying to figure out what is going on with the Aloof, perhaps questioning them. When you do question them, they will remain vague forcing you to struggle and dig more to discern their true feelings.

There is a noticeable pattern with these 4 basic control dramas. The Intimidator drama creates the Poor Me drama and when they are in a relationship together expressing their dramas, they will feed from each other’s energies. Interrogator control dramas create Aloof control dramas and vice versa. People who predominantly express these dramas will oftentimes be in relationships and feed from each other’s energies.

The key to letting go of a control drama is first to bring it fully into your awareness. You do that by looking back through your life at your behavior patterns in conflict situations. Notice the particular style of control you have exercised over others. Notice what you may have learned in childhood to get attention and energy moving your way. Perhaps you had a parent who exhibited Intimidator control drama behavior causing you to adopt Poor Me control drama behaviors.

Second, you must make a conscious decision to let go of the need to control others to get attention, or energy. Learn and practice techniques to defuse control dramas when demonstrated by you or others. Over time, you will find healthier alternatives to obtaining energy such as tapping into the infinite supply of universal energy through meditation.

Deborah Perkins
Luminous Transformations
480-788-7140

Clear Communication Boundaries

When we instill and honor healthy communication boundaries, we cultivate healthy relationships based on honesty and integrity. Setting and honoring healthy communication boundaries goes beyond what we say to people and how we say it. It also encompasses how we listen to people and what communication vehicles we use to best support our message.

For example, if you wanted to discuss a personal and sensitive issue with someone, would an email or text message be the best vehicle? We run the risk of being misinterpreted and alienating a customer, friend or loved one if the communication vehicle we choose doesn’t match the sensitivity of the communication.

Gossip is a major communication boundary violation. Gossip fosters unhealthy competition, creates negative and hurtful feelings, and sows discord and unease thereby creating distance between people. There is an important distinction between gossip and clarification. Gossip is when 2 or more people talk about someone who is absent, and the absent person is equally distant from both talkers.  However, when clarification occurs, the absent person is generally closer to the talker than to the listener.  The outcome of gossip is that the listener is stimulated to some type of action such as spreading the gossip to others, shunning the absent person, or changing their opinion about the absent person.  A clarifying conversation leads to action on the part of the speaker such as taking advice from the person they are talking to that leads to a change.

Here are some communication tips that will help you create and maintain healthy relationships:

•       Set clear boundaries around gossip and put a stop to it immediately whenever someone attempts to engage you in it.

•       Pay attention to other people’s boundaries and acknowledge boundaries that have been set.  If you want people to honor your boundaries, then you must do the same.

•       Whenever you are asked an appropriate question, refusing to respond is a communication violation.  If you are not able or ready to respond, be sure to clarify that you need more information or time.  If you need more time to contemplate your answer, let the person asking know when you will follow-up with an answer.

•       If someone gives you an answer that sets a boundary you don’t like and therefore decide to ignore, you are creating a communication boundary violation.  You don’t have to like an answer, but you do have to respect the person’s boundaries.

•       If you have a strained relationship with someone and haven’t made an attempt to remedy it, it would be inappropriate for you to ask for a favor without first addressing the state of your relationship.

•       Similarly, if you make a request from someone that is unusual or inappropriate to the nature of the relationship, this is also a communication boundary violation.  Be certain to precede your request with an acknowledgment that it is unusual and an explanation of why you are making the request.

Deborah Perkins

LuminousTransformations

480-788-7140